07 August 2009

Ma bike lane's bin murr derred sirr!


This is central London, so when we block cycle lanes, it's with style. No mere broken WKD bottles or smeary discarded kebabs for us.

This is the contraflow bike lane going down from Waterloo Bridge to the South Bank, blocked up last night by filmcrew stuff. No signs, no alternative route: you're forced out with no notice into oncoming traffic. At least, in the spotlight, you can audition for Britain's Got Talent during your final seconds.

The handiwork was that of Scottish TV, filming a murr derr scene for detective series Taggart. In fact, they couldn't film because just after I took the pic, the heavens opened for business and deluged central London all evening. So the film crew had to stand around inside, kick their heels doing nothing for five hours, and just swop apocryphal stories about famous people they've worked with. Instead of business as usual, which is to stand around outside, kick their heels doing nothing for five hours, and just swop apocryphal stories about famous people they've worked with.

Some might criticise the tedious Glaswegian gumshoe as being unrealistic; like every other screen cop all he does is investigate (and invariably solve) unawful killings. But actually, screen cops are true to life in one way. You never see real police chasing drivers who block ASLs, chatter on their phone, or speed through residential roads either. Or give a toss about blocked cycle lanes.

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